Aid for an ageing Virgin.

Thanks for checking this out everyone. (Hopefully the title wasn't too deterring. ^_^)

I should probably say that, while it definitely has relations, this post of mine isn't strictly aligned to dating, so I apologize for that if it happens to bother you in what ever way it may)

I hope that the day's been treating you all kindly and I'm sorry for bothering you as well.

On this day, if permitted, I'd like to ask for some assistance with, well, dealing and being around people. (It is likely the greatest of my deadened abilities)

To speak a bit about me;

My name is Austin, my gender is male, and my age is placed at 26.

I did not have the luck of having my parents around for long, which i could see being a major aspect of my many problems.

My Mother was taken by Cancer when I was 9, at the same age that I am now. (26)

My Father decided to not linger for long, and happened to have left my Mother and I when I was around 2. That's about as much as I know about/regarding him.

I wasn't overly liked while I was in Public School. Strangely enough, a good portion of the people found my lack of a Mother amusing, for reasons I'd rather not know.

I never did find out how people learned of that knowledge. I've never really been the type to talk much, especially after she passed, so I always just believed Teachers told them.

Anyways, Since I've spoken about not really talking to much; I've also never have really been the type to have friends. Most of the dude's I've happened to have known of have been, well, rather douchey I guess would be most accurate of me to say. Most definitely of the type I'd rather not know of, if I'm to be more honest than I should perhaps be.

As for women, I've sadly have had extremely slight and minimal experience/interactions. To list the Ladies I have "known" will not take long.

My Mother. (Proabably sad to list) (Age 26, on death)

A girl named Alexandria, who I met in Kindergarten. (~ Age 5?) (Likely sad to list due to age)

Another girl named Rachel, who I met in early public school. She happens to be the only girl I've been kissed by. (~Age 7)

Colleen, I woman I decided to message a few days before Valentine's day to see if she'd like to do something together. I never did get a response, but on the day of Valentine's day, and as I ask her once again, she simply says that her lack of a response should have been seen as an answer. (In a bit of a meaner way, hers) (~ Age 19)

For the most part, it's been around 7 years since I've really spoken to anyone. (Not counting "Hello's" and Store visit words and what not) (Which, I guess I should say, Hello's from me are quite rare. ^_^)

4 years ago I moved to a city. (It didn't change what I hoped it would.)

I'm really goddamned awkward, socially. I can't really look at people for long.

Maintaining eye contact is a task that's even more difficult. As with simply looking, it feels like I'm analyzing people, or being analyzed myself. I guess I find it rather bothersome because, well, I doubt people have and raise their Children simply for them to be stared at, throughout life. (Bunch of other reasons too, that one's definitely up there though, for me)

I think I've already mentioned it, but I also don't really speak. (I probably could have been born mute and it likely wouldn't have affected my life too badly) I hate the sound of my voice, and my choice of picking up smoking 8 years ago really didn't/isn't helping it sound any more pretty.

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I am also 100% sure no one wants to hear a thing that I could have to say, whether it could be Praise or compliments, there are better, and perhaps, more attractive people that could be saying it, no?

I should probably mention that I'm pretty atrocious, appearance-wise. I like to blame it on my abandoning Father. My Mother was pretty, from what I can remember; so it wasn't made so by her, my hideousness. Or so I'll believe)

I've become pretty errant. There's also more that I think I wanted to say.

But for now, I'll just see what anyone else has to say. (I may have made it hard to do so, my apologies if I have done so.

Thanks for reading this, those that do. ^_^ Thanks for assisting as well.