I’m giving up hope with dating. I’ve been effectively single for a year when my marriage collapsed unexpectedly after mere months (ex husband texted me from an airport and told me it was done lol). I’ve had some real humdinger dates over the past 12 months, and while they make great stories for all of my happily married friends, I’m tired of having this as my reality. I just want to find a partner to share my life with and I can’t understand why all of the men I attract (very handsome, typically extremely successful, seemingly normal) turn out to be such narcissistic sociopaths or just plain douchebags.

I had a particularly bad date last night and I just need to vent about it. I’m 29F and he’s 32M. He’s a plastic surgeon, very attractive, and we had good back and forth on the app chat before meeting. Our date lasted about two hours. During this timeframe, I saw what a narcissist he really is. He kept asking if he made me nervous or if he intimidated me. It seemed as though he wanted me to say yes, but lol. He continuously bragged about how many nurses have tried to sleep with him, and what an “asshole” he is at work because he knows what he’s doing. At one point, we were sitting on a bench and talking, and I noticed he was looking at my face in a rather odd way. He followed up with, “You know, you only look 26, so if you came to me and told me you wanted Botox I’d tell you that you have probably two years before you need that.” He legitimately thought this was a compliment and seemed proud of himself for saying that. He also asked if I was nervous if he didn’t find me “physically attractive” and said he does, but if he didn’t he’d have just walked away when he saw me.

And to make matters wildly worse, he had deliberately hid the fact he has a child. I had jokingly asked about if he had kids (we’d been talking daily for two weeks and had shared a decent amount of information) and he got uncomfortable and said, “Yes, but he was a mistake with my ex wife, so I gave her full custody. I think he’s around two now, but I don’t see him.”

Barf. Barf, barf, barf, barf.

At the end of the date, he asked me about 12 times to come upstairs to my place. I denied him, then he said “we’ll have to see about a second date then, because a LOT of women are talking to me”. He texted an hour later and asked me on a second date, but I told him I just didn’t feel any chemistry, so I’d pass. He became petty and I blocked him.

I just don’t want to keep giving up a night or two every week for my foreseeable future to misogynistic dicks. I don’t know what I’m looking for with this post – any relatable or uplifting advice? I really just needed to vent. I’ve a large group of friends, but when I tell them these stories they seem them as humourous, and they don’t understand how much dating is wearing me down emotionally.