I may not have the worst luck when it comes to dating, but boy howdy is it pretty bad. I get ghosted by the overwhelming landslide majority of women i ask out, and for some reason the more i have in common with someone, and the better our chemistry is, the more likely they are to ghost me. And if they give a reason, which is unlikely, it’s always a blatant lie. It’s always something dramatic. Someone always ends up in the hospital exactly at the time our date was supposed to start. The one time i got anything resembling an honest answer for the reason for ghosting was from the one girl I’ve had the best chemistry with EVER, by a mile. She said i “look like” or “seem like” a cheater. Like i “seem like someone who’s already in a relationship”… I mean, i could’ve sworn there was this old adage about books and covers and whether or not you should judge them by them, but she ghosted me all the same. Maybe that was just biased by the fact that her ex-fiance cheated on her, but it’s all i have to go on to guess about all the other instances of girls ghosting me.

Now for some info about me, i guess. 6’4″, hereto, more athletic than not, I’ve been complimented on my looks but my dating history (or lack thereof) and years of bullying as a kid have left me with crushing self image issues. I’m fairly shy, a total nerd, kind of socially inept in general, but nonetheless big on making others laugh. And not to toot my own horn but I’m pretty good at making people laugh.. if they’re the kind of people who like my sense of humor, which logically tends to be the kind of person i hang out with. When it comes to choosing who i spend time with, both romantically and plutonically, I’m very VERY much a quality over quantity kind of guy. I don’t bother spending time with someone if i don’t feel a connection, which leads nicely into my next point.

I really cannot stress enough just how much I’m not a cheater. Even if i had any such desire (which to reiterate i don’t) i wouldn’t be able to act on it because i literally can’t casually get laid (no judgment for people who do casually go out and get laid, that’s just not me). If i don’t have a real connection with someone then I’ll have no desire to get naked with them. And even at that, such a person would probably ghost me anyways. And again, no desire whatsoever to cheat.

I mean, maybe i come across as “being in a relationship” because I’m not overtly flirtatious (being overtly flirtatious has always failed when I’ve actually tried) and i also don’t believe in being “completed” by a relationship. I’m a whole and complete human being, not missing either half of myself. That’s said, man’s still lonely, ya know?

I’ve tried everything. I’ve met women at college, at bars, and other miscellaneous public places. I’ve tried tinder, bumble, hinge, PoF, OkCupid, match. Nothing. On match, half the women i talked to mentioned me being too young to be looking for anything serious before ghosting me (despite being 3 years older than me, tops)

So what’s a man to do?