I’ve been seeing this girl for 4.5 months now and things have been amazing. We aren’t official, but we both know that we are heading towards a relationship and are pretty much already committed to each other.

Unfortunately one day I saw on her laptop that she had been talking to other guys on messenger. I asked her if she had anything to tell me and her face fell immediately. She told me she had had a videocall with a guy she used to go out with.

This was NOT what I was expecting. I asked if they did anything else, like hangout, and she told me no. We then went to a party later that evening, and I decided to ask her to see the messages. That’s when she told me that they had actually went for a walk and had dinner together at her place. She then begged me to look at the messages because she wanted me to know everything.

I decided not to look at the messages until the next day when she left her laptop open and left to get us coffee. She was the one who reached out to him, but it was purely friendly and there was no flirting of any sort. She tells me nothing happened when they hung out, and that she knew he was ”safe territory” because he is best friends with one of his exes, so she knew he wouldn’t take her reaching out as a sign of interest in something other than friendship.

I’m not upset that they hung out. What I’m upset about is the lies. I knew something was off the day that they hung out, and I asked her about it, and she told me that she was caring for her mom who was supposedly in tears after a breakup. Now I know that was a lie. She wasn’t with her mother, she was with this guy.

She told me the reason she lied to me was because she knew what it looked like and didn’t want to lose me. She feels really stupid and embarrassed about it all and wants to work things out. I think she is capable of doing it again. However, she does seem genuinely remorseful, and when all this happened we weren’t where we are today. I don’t know how I can trust her again… Should I give her a chance, or should I drop her?