Some background. So I’m around 24 and I have a few scars on my upper forearm. I’m not really self conscious per say; I’ve been working out the last few years so I tend to wear a lot of short sleeves because I like how they make me feel and look, so I don’t hide them intentionally. I’m also not personally ashamed of my scars, because I know why I have them and why I felt the need to make them in the first place. They’re old and white by now but there are a couple that are thicker than others from when I was really feeling ‘down’ (for lack of a better word). Since then I’ve taken anti anxiety/depression medication, worked on my mental health with a therapist, and went on testosterone (I’m trans). My scars served as a reminder to me that I am alive and I do not regret them.

Now, I haven’t really dated all that much, and have only been really considering dipping my toe into that sort of scene for a minute now. I’ve never really wanted to date before because I didn’t feel that I was ready, that I could be a good partner and, frankly, that I liked anyone well enough to want to spend any significant amount of time with them–especially intimately (emotionally and physically). I’ve worked on myself a lot, I’ve been on T for four years now and am confident in who I am and how I look. I suppose I’m wondering if my scars would make someone think less of me? I’m planning on getting them covered up with another tattoo after this COVID stuff begins to settle, and I’d like that tattoo to remind me of my life in much the way that my scars had, obviously in a lighter and less self-destructive way. But until that point, should I even bother trying to date? There’s a girl at work that I think I could like if I gave myself the chance but I’d really hate to make her uncomfortable if we got close and she inevitably spotted my scars. And, selfishly, I don’t think it would feel too good to be rejected because of them and my perceived current mental health issues. What would you think if you saw a guy’s scars? Would that make him unattractive to you? Would you even want to pursue something with someone who had scars? Should I be covering my scars up? Thanks for any feedback to anyone who wants to answer, it means a lot.

(I understand my being trans is probably a deal-breaker to some in of itself, but I ask that we focus this discussion on the scars–I’ll cross that other hurdle on my own. I only included my status as FtM because it is a reflection on my efforts on myself just as much as therapy and medication is.)