I’m 24 I never been in a relationship, never had a wild phase, didn’t have friends to make memories with etc. In 2nd grade to graduating high school I was put on a very high amount of adhd medication and it turned me into a zombie. It made me just want to be alone. I would go to school then come home play video games and repeat.

I feel I missed out on “young love” for lack of a better word and or a wild phase. Like sneaking out of my house to see a girl, kissing her in the hallway, the hypersexualized and carefree environment of youth, playing games like spin the bottle, staying up all night to talk to her and adventure, exploring abandoned places, school dances, etc..

Now it feels like all the girls are ready to settle down now. They already had there fun growing up with various relationships and or hookups. Now they want to settle down. I am nowhere near ready to settle down I never even started yet. I feel I need a wild phase to cope with my youth I feel I lost. Not just hooking up even though that is a big part of it. I want adventure and life experience to make memories. I’m not sure how exactly to put it into words hopefully that made sense.

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I was also fat growing up. I recently lost 60 pounds and now am beginning to get a small amount of attention from girls. I want to and will lose a lot more weight and become as fit as I possibly can. I also just graduated with a degree in exercise science, starting to personal train, and looking at grad schools.

I am just having a huge problem of not being able to get out of my head. Since middle school seeing everyone else in relationships, hooking up, and or making memories with friends while you’re left alone wondering whats wrong with me really messes with a persons head. It keeps me from getting things done in life.

Any feedback is greatly appreciated and thanks for taking the time to read my post.