(F26) When I first started dating in college, I was so hopeful, romantic, and naive. I fell for guys hard and fast, which led to a few heartbreaks. I’m thankful for these experiences, because I think they’re necessary for everyone to have in order to learn about what we want/don’t want from a partner as well as how we act when in a relationship. I had two consecutive relationships in which the guys were so into me to start and assured me they were in it for the long haul, only to change their minds after 3-4 months and break up with me out of the blue. Those hurt the most, and in the end I wasn’t meant to be with either of them, but years later I can’t help but feel that those experiences along with OLD have left me quite jaded and pessimistic about dating and actually finding someone. Since college I’ve had plenty of dating and hookup experiences; I’m not afraid to put myself out there and I do make honest attempts to connect with the guys I date. I’ve definitely enjoyed exploring the more casual side of dating as well as non monogamy, but I feel like I’m getting farther away from establishing a truly deep connection with anyone. I go into things assuming one of us will get bored and eventually ghost the other, and even if they did remain interested I still can’t trust it because they could change their minds at any moment. Thanks to hookup culture and OLD these assumptions are usually correct. I’m honestly just numb to the whole experience in a way, and it feels like I’m just going through the motions at this point without really having hope that any of it will lead somewhere. I can have great conversations and great physical chemistry with guys, but there’s something blocking me that’ll never allow me to see it going anywhere. If “the one” is a thing it could be that I haven’t met him, but at 26 I feel like I’ve done so much dating and I’m seeing people all around me settle into serious relationships so it almost feels like I’m the odd one out. It’s a frustrating feeling to deal with…I know I’m still young and I’m not in a rush, but it feels like with every new dating/hookup experience I have I default to this mindset and drive myself farther away from exploring deeper connections and ultimately a relationship again. I guess I’m tired of all this dating going nowhere but also too scared/jaded to ever consider a relationship. Does anyone else feel similarly? How did you deal with these issues?