I’m a 36 year old male and recently went on a date. I chatted with a woman for some while and we really got along, she and I had a lot in common and we shared values that I rarely find in other people. She wanted to meet and I agreed. We met at a café. When I was with her I just blanked, I couldn’t even try to be charming and just asked dull questions, most of which I already knew the answer to. I simply couldn’t be myself; the person she had got to know. After the date she messaged me saying she didn’t see us together. I replied and said it was nice meeting her and to take care. Then she removed me from social media.

I’ve had burning regrets since. I had a chance to meet a rare and interesting woman that shared my values and I didn’t even try! I feel that i blew a once in a lifetime opportunity. It really hurts and it’s affecting my sleep and my well being. I over analyze what went wrong and what I could’ve done different and if replying to her last message in another way could’ve given me another chance. Occasionally I glide towards self-deceit and try to blame her or find another excuse. I know it’s not healthy to do what I’m doing, but I can’t help it.

I have not contacted her since and I won’t try to contact her again, her removing me from social media sent a clear message.

I am trying to see it as a lesson, and avoid making the same mistake again next time, But I am stuggling to get past this. Has anyone been in a similar situation or has advice on how to handle this?