I’ve (30M] always had an easy time making friends, or at least acquaintances who really really like me. Even when it comes to women. My best friend is a woman, and no matter if it’s her male friends or female friends they all tell her the same, that I’m an awesome and really funny guy, which she forwards to me. Whenever she’s hanging with them and she asks if it’s okay if I come they always say “yes”, no questions asked.

Not since school have I ever had someone outright despise, or even dislike me. You know where they barely even ackowledge you when you try to speak to them or they downright insult you. I’ve never been in a verbal fight in my life because of people disliking me.

My best friend herself always keeps complimenting me, saying how wonderful I am, how much I bring to people’s lives, etc.

So platonically, I’m really well off. The problem is, I can’t for some reason not transfer this to getting people to like me romantically.

I’m not completely worthless when it comes to dating. I’ve had 3 or so relationships during my life, with the longest being 6 months, but I feel like I struggle far more than most do. When it sounds like on my friends that it maybe takes them 5 dates with different girls at most to at the very least get a one-night stand, it can take me like 20,30,40 or even 50 dates with different girls.

I know that I’m not ugly. I’m no model either, but when I post photos on Photofeeler or different subreddits I always get around a strong 6 or weak 7. So no model, but definitely at the level where my looks aren’t the problem.

I do have Aspergers, which may be a part of the explanation, but like I said I have an extremely easy time being liked by people, so I dunno.

Thing is, 99% of my dates say the same, that I seem like a really nice guy (hardy harr harr Niceguy™. No, not really), but that they don’t feel any stronger connection. They say they had a fun time and thank me for bringing them on a fun date, but seldom they want to pursue anything. I think I’ve managed to get a second date less than 7-8 times in my life, with 3 of them leading to relationships and then 3-4 more to sex.

What is it I’m missing? From my point of view I have everything I need for at least someone to take some interest. It must be something I do, or rather not do, at dates. So the question is; what difference do you have with your behaviour during dates, compared to making friends? I have tried to be more physical and touch girls on the shoulders/upper back, tell them they are beautiful eyes/smile and such. The last one has actually been appreciated, but I’ve been told by some that they aren’t used to people touching them on first dates so I’ve stopped that altogether.

So, what difference is there in making friends versus getting past first dates? acknowledge