Going through a rough time with Seperation (28M)

So a few weeks ago my wife left me and we seperated because I became physically aggressive with her. In short I grabbed her and held against a wall. Cops were called. It was a sad tragic night. A little back story…..I was a shitty bf and husband I cheated 4 times on wife in the past, I was angry a lot, and since I was in the Army I had that my way or the highway mentality. I have had a lot of untreated issues that can explain why I've been the way I am. But believe me I will NEVER use it as an excuse for what I did. I've been deeply regretful for my actions and I genuinely want to change. I've seen so much death I've seen people being killed I've had bad sexual experiences including the first time I had sex, girl wouldn't let me leave work unless I had sex with her and I just froze even tho I said no (when I was 18). Still haunts me to this day.

My wife was the first I ever shared some of these things. But I never sought help from a professional. Fast forward to today. I'm seeing a therapist I'm in a group to help control my anger and I'm on meds. I've been diagnosed with depression and moderate PTSD and anxiety. I have occuring nightmares, and have constant fears in large gatherings. I do feel so happy to finally do this and work on my mental health. Even though I've cried so much for the pain Ive inflicted onto other in the past. My wife and I do have a baby and another one on the way. It's the best news I've had in a long time. I don't want us to make a decision simply because a newborn is on the way, I want it to be organic. I know what transpired recently is a serious offense. But I've never been violent and I truly want to help and save our marriage. I still choose to love her even after she put me through a lot of emotional abuse during our early years of our relationshio. I am a firm believer in, if people chose to change and work things out then they can. Am I crazy for doing this or thinking this way? Please help give me genuine advice! I will be happy to answer these questions.