21F in college. I’ve been on multiple dates and some short-lived relationship type things. I’ve explored online dating over the years and after one terrible sexually traumatizing experience, it’s been hard for me to approach sex again. I ended up not having sex for two years. So right before quarantine I met a guy on bumble and we talked over text for a week and met up and hung out for a week before spring break around three times. He seemed so understanding about my sexual trauma in the beginning so I felt comfortable so we ended up having sex. We got along so well and he would put his arm around me in public or held my hand toward our second “date.” He even suggested we do a marathon together eventually and wanted to take a picture of me w the sunset in the background when we went running together. The nature of this was relatively casual but based on his actions it seemed kind of casual but possibly leading somewhere. We definetely were planning to hang out after spring break. Then during spring break, we continue to text and he starts asking about my family and more deeper topics. All of a sudden tho, he doesn’t respond for four days and replies later that he “was sorry and wasn’t around his phone.” I was neurotic during this time bc it just was a random drop out of nowhere. And then he becomes slightly more responsive for a day or two and starts becoming more distant again. At this point it was looking clear that university was closing down. So I told him hey hmu if you’re im town again bc it kinda seems like you don’t wanna talk? And he didn’t respond again. This my first time getting ghosted. Why does this happen? Esp when someone seems interested in the beginning? And esp after having sex? It hurts esp bc he’s the first guy I’ve done it with in a very long time. If he reaches out when I get back to campus should I respond? Or was this a complete dick move? Idk why I keep thinking about this when it’s been months since it happened.
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