Hey everyone, can’t sleep so just posting to see if anyone relates to this. So when I (23F) use “dating apps” I’m 100% looking for hookups. I’m not looking for relationships, not dates, nor friends. I do tend to get hookups but I kinda hit a cumulative quagmire two weeks ago that’s made me a little upset.
So when I match or like a guy, I usually like a little bit of conversation to suss out stuff. Nothing major, nothing demanding. I’m usually physically attracted to these guys, they are too, they are looking to have fun, and so am I. But I’ve kinda noticed that most guys (like nearly 20 at this point lol) just want to chat but not meet???
I’m not talking about sexting nor swapping pics but they start to show genuine interest in me, the conversations then ever into deep confessional stuff for them like past relationships, childhoods, interests, state of the world, their hobbies, morality, psychological stuff, their workplace interactions, projects, uni life, friends, and family etc.
I’d chirp in and ask stuff like “hey do you want get a coffee?” Or “did you wanna meet up sometime?” And usually give flaky reasons “I’ve got work” or “I’m a bit busy”. I totally respect all of that and when I see no prospect of meeting and slowly start to stagger my replies or pull out, they get really worried that I’ve lost interest or that I might be meeting someone else now????
So I’m like maybe they’re just looking for a chat but then you hear through various grapevines or from a friend of a friend of a friend, that “yeah he hooked up with her” or “I went on a date with him” like all that shit and I’m like??!? Why??? Am?? I??! Not??? Getting??? Any???
Lol any advice, because this has happened with like 20+ guys???? And some of them I’ve been talking to them for like 18months now????
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