warning long post
The past year I’ve experienced some pretty extreme ups and downs in my dating life. However, the last 3 months things took a turn for the worst and the guy that I was with basically left me for another woman, got dumped then came back, then found someone else and ghosted me. Sigh
My mental and physical health was at an all time low and with the end of that relationship (plus the isolation and uncertainty due to the coronavirus) it all triggered my depression. I couldn’t see a way out. I lost my libido completely, I began emotional eating, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t cry anymore. I lost connection with myself and all my important relationships suffered for it.
The last few weeks I’ve been slowly turning things around. I’m slowly getting my life back and I’m nurturing my mental health and physical health and friendships again. I took my power back y’all.
Here’s how I’ve really healed the most: Instead of telling myself lies like- “all those girls are better than me, prettier than me, sexier, funnier, more fun, etc.” Instead I acknowledge that yes, she’s beautiful and she has many beautiful qualities that make her her, but that does not take anyway from my beauty and my beautiful qualities that make me me. I’m not going to compete with the whole world. I can’t. The only thing I want to do is compete with myself and celebrate the beauty in others by being inspired by it.
-“He rejected me, and I’ll never find anyone better” Instead I acknowledge that deep down I don’t want someone that does not want me. Not seeing me for the wonderful, wholesome, and fun person that I am and strive to be is a turn off and he’s not the one I want. I’ll find someone who is just as crazy about me as I am about them.
-“What if she can make him happy but I couldn’t?” Instead I acknowledge that it’s extremely arrogant and selfish of me to want his happiness dependent on me. If he can only be made “happy” through other people he’ll never be happy. And honestly by knowing that man, no one can truly make him happy, not in the long run. I feel sorry for him. He hasn’t figured out what kind of person he wants to be, the kind of person that he would be proud to be and then taken the steps to become that person. I have done that work, and I’m extremely proud of who I am. I struggle every single day. But it gets easier when I keep working towards the woman I want to be.
I wanted to share this with you guys because you’ve all helped me tremendously and I hope I can help someone struggling like I was❤️ Mad love to you all
submitted by /u/meru58
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