TLDR; I have a crush on my co-worker. We are friends but there isn’t any constant stream of contact outside of work. She is fresh off leaving her first long-term boyfriend and I want to respect that. I also now want to date her since she’s told me about her break up, I didn’t want to before then. Anxious and inexperienced, what do?
I’m a college student so I picked up a shitty gas station job during corona in March while I finish school in a year. She is an assistant manager at my store and she trained me so we have been pretty good work friends since day 1.
She is generally a very kind person, as you have to be in retail, but we have a good time when we work together. Lots of smiles and laughter.
We don’t text frequently or anything and we have only hung out after work twice. She asked me to come over both times but I’m assuming as friends since, like I said, she is generally very kind. She also had a boyfriend of four years at the time and I don’t operate that way in the event she was interested. Each time we just smoked a few bowls, checked out her Animal Crossing island, and I left after about an hour. It felt weird being there while her boyfriend was at work or I wouldn’t have left so quickly.
She tells me three weeks ago at work that she broke up with the guy. Which honestly, great for her, dude was just such a scrub. You could sense it the first time meeting him that the relationship made no sense from her perspective. She did all the heavy lifting while he fucked around.
Since she told me this I haven’t been able to stop thinking of her as a romantic possibility. Before when she was with someone? She was an attractive young woman who I was happy to be friends with. Now? Damnnnnn she’s a total catch that is still just a friend, but I find myself wanting to possibly explore the possibility of expanding our friendship but unable to communicate it. Even if she says no I would totally still be friends with her, she’s that cool.
It’s a mixture of anxiety from not knowing what to do, not having the self-confidence, as well as wanting to respect her space as she is probably still down from her break up even though she’s the one who left him.
I’ve always been able to make friends with women but have never been able to take it to the next level. Its not the “friend zone” either, it’s the “paralyzed by fear zone.” It’s the biggest no-lose situation for me since I have no issue staying just friends, but I just can’t take the leap.
submitted by /u/QurantineLean
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