So this is going to be a long story so sit back and relax. So I met this guy (Nathaniel) in preschool and we didn’t like each other we were always fighting well fast forward a few years to eighth grade and he’s dating my friend and we constantly competed for her attention. So me and him ended up becoming best friends in the process and they broke up and eventually she stopped hanging out with me. Then high school came along and he got feelings for me but I didn’t feel the same and I ended up getting into an abusive relationship that I was trapped in two years later sophomore year he still had feelings for me and I ended up getting out of that relationship. So eventually I started liking him but by the time I started liking him he didn’t like me back but not only that I had told my friend that I liked him and that I wanted to date him and he told me he might date me then things went downhill quick I found out they were talking. So they both told me that they wouldn’t date like they both promised me and I was like OK but I need to take some time for myself so I took two weeks away from them because I was stressed. So when I came back he asked her out even though he told me he wouldn’t and I felt betrayed because those were my best friends and they straight up told me they would not date and then they did anyways but you know they didn’t work out. So now I’m in junior year of high school and I know I’m in high school I’m gonna be plenty of guys but I really don’t know what to do in the situation because it got worse. So it got to the point where he was basically my only friend and we do and talk about everything together and he still has feelings for me or at least he did I’m getting to that. So basically early this year I started dating a boy named Cayleb and he had a sister named Earris sadly they had to move away to another state and I had to break up with Cayleb so I got into a relationship with another abusive guy but me and Earris were best friends and we talked every day and we told each other everything just like me and Nathaniel. Earris and Nathaniel didn’t have the best relationship like they were friends and all but Nathaniel got annoyed by her and wasn’t really interested in her. Well eventually one day Nathaniel asked me out and I said yes because I wasn’t really into him but I knew I could trust him and I felt like I couldn’t trust anybody but him but the next day my ex was trying to kill himself because I was with Nathaniel so Nathaniel said I don’t want to do this if someone’s going to try and kill themselves maybe we should wait and I agreed. Then he came to me telling me he’s obsessed with his ex Tracy still then a few days later he said he’s over her and he was trying to get with me. And we were flirting and he even told me he loved me but he was scared to get with me that’s initially why he got with my friend instead of me in the first place the year prior to this. But you know he was still trying to go out with me and I was gaining feelings for him and I had planned a date with him. I Was actually supposed to go on the date with him tomorrow but things changed and shit came up. Today I was talking to him and he tells me he got engaged to Earris and I’m like well what the fuck you didn’t have feelings for her you’ve been obsessed with me and she’s my best friend. So he told me it started out as a joke and they were jokingly engaged but then they started flirting and he had feelings for her even though they only talked for a few hours and then he decided that he never had feelings for me all along and he just thought he did and he was now going to drop me to go for this girl and this girl knew that I liked him as well and she did the same thing so the only two people I could trust fucked me over and he did this to me again. It’s not even like I usually have feelings for this guy I just see him as a friend most of the time but then he gets feelings for me and I start to like him but then he gets all scared of dating me and such and he stops having feelings for me and then goes out with one of my friends and fucking betrays me. But I can’t drop him because he’s the closest person I have I really want to drop both of them but the one guy is the closest person I have and I don’t really have anybody else but if he’s going to keep toying with my emotions just because he can’t decide whether he actually wants to date me or not like I don’t know what to do. Tells me that he scared of dating me because he’s afraid he’s going to accidentally say something bad and hurt me and it’s going to ruin what we have but he has no problem impulsively dating girls that he’s only liked for a day. Anyways I start talking to the girl Because he had been asking to take me to dinner anyways because he felt bad and turns out she put him up to it so I was like fuck no I’m not going to his dinner why the fuck would I go to dinner just because he feels bad because he fucking betrayed me because he likes another girl that would just make shit awkward so then I’m just like you know what I still care about him but this other girl like me and her are really close and she would drop him and hurt him over me because I’m hurt so I decided that I need to drop that girl so she doesn’t hurt him and break things off with him because at the end of the day I still care about him and I don’t want anybody to hurt him. Usually when a guy does shit like this to me I hurt them back and ruin their month or maybe even a year but every time he’s done stuff like this to me I couldn’t bring myself to hurt him or get revenge. I just don’t know what to do because I’m afraid that this is going to happen again because I’m not stupid I mean obviously his relationship isn’t going to work out but I don’t wanna be any part of that but what if he starts doing this shit to me again what if he tells himself he likes me and he truly believes that he likes me but when it comes down to it he really doesn’t like me and he just hurts me again because at this point I mean him and Earris were the only two people I can trust but now I can’t trust anybody because those are the only two people that hadn’t really fucked me over or at least not in a long time for Nathaniel‘s case. I mean the first time he did this shit to me I for gave him but I don’t know if I can now. And the thing is it’s like I fucking resent him now and I feel bad about that but it’s just he can’t do anything to redeem himself ever like he’s not gonna be able to do anything to make this up to me but I don’t wanna have this grudge between us for the rest of our lives so what can I do to get over this but not distance myself from him or hurt our friendship.
submitted by /u/spaghettimonster666
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