So I was in a toxic relationship at the beginning of this year, wasn’t super long lasted a couple of months and to say the least my ex treated me terribly and was incredibly selfish, manipulative, passive aggressive, moody, and overall a negative person to be around yet I still grew super attached to her because in the beginning of our relationship she love bombed me. For those of you who aren’t familiar with that term, love bombing is when a person at the beginning of a relationship moves at a super fast pace and bombards you with lots of attention and compliments. They might say things like “I love you” after only being together for a couple of weeks(my ex did that) or they might already be saying super lovey dovey romantic things super quickly before you guys even really get to know each other. This basically traps you into being codependent on them because this attention is addictive, especially if you have low self esteem. Anyway, so I recently started talking to someone new and she’s actually way nicer and more positive and a way better person for me than my ex. I’m taking it slow but like even a couple of other girls that I met were nicer than her. It’s refreshing to know that just because I had a bad experience with a toxic person doesn’t mean that every girl I date will treat me the same way. I’ve often idealized going back to my ex and trying to start again because we had such a good thing going at first but now I realized I don’t have to and there are other people out there that are a better fit. You’ll see though, that if you have dated a toxic person in the past, there are plenty of others out there that are better. You just idealize that person instead of seeing them for who they really are.
submitted by /u/wellz-or-hellz
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