Opinion: mainstream dating apps need to ask about sexual preferences/sex drive in their basic questions (Credit: datingoverthirty sub)

This isn't entirely my post, as it came from the Dating Over Thirty subreddit, but I wanted to bring the conversation over here because I feel like this subreddit is a lot more diverse in opinions. In the post, the OP writes:

"It doesn’t need to be visible to anyone but I was discussing this with a friend and I hear from a lot of people that relationships fall apart after an initial spurt due to sex drives or preferences being wildly incompatible. My theory is the 'classier' apps want to avoid being a hook up haven, which I get but they ask you about every other topic under the sun when your answering questions for their algorithms.

Physical intimacy is a huge deal for most of us but there is a pretty clear spectrum that would fit nicely into their multiple choice questions. I think it’s a mistake to shy away from gathering basic info on this topic."

I agree with this for the most part. OkCupid used to go into more depth with it for the better in their profile questions section (assuming they were being honest,) but no one really uses that site/app as much anymore.

The subject of sex can be a very taboo topic among many people I encounter on major swipe dating apps because they believe it means that the other person is only looking for a hookup if they bring it up, or that it will make them sound easy. Many will put the subject behind lock and key until you've gone on several dates and are promised some kind of commitment, but what happens if you find out that you have a higher sex drive or a more adventurous sexual energy than the person you're seeing? You're potentially wasting both of your times going through the motions of pursuing a relationship in a way that leaves out a huge piece of the puzzle. I personally might lose interest in a woman if after talking for awhile she seems very guarded about sex.

Granted, sexual chemistry also isn't instantaneous for some, but still, you should have some idea as to where you stand and what you expect. I also think a more open and mature dialogue about sex would improve the quality of conversations and probably prevent a lot of instances of ghosting or wondering if the other person had ulterior motives. If anything, I think more people (guys especially…) would be less prone to ghosting a conversation if they had an idea as to what the sex life might look like if they pursued someone.