I'm a south asian woman.
I dated this one black guy when I was in my late teens, for like…two months. He was my first romantic relationship. He was also my prom date so he met my mom. My dad wasn't too fond of him. However, he ended up being a cheater and manipulator, etc. I never really told my mom what happened between us, just that we broke up.
Almost 6-7 years later (been single since), my mom still brings up that "You only like black guys." Even some of my friends bring/brought it up. I feel like it's super offensive because of the tone my mom uses, it almost insinuates that black men aren't good people to date. Also, it insinuates that just because I dated one kind of person, I should ONLY EVER be attracted to that particular race/ethnicity/type, whatever. I feel like I'm being put in a box and if anything, it makes me feel like I CAN'T date black men, just because I don't want my mom and friends to say "I told you so." or "we knew, we're not surprised." But like how would y'all know my type when I've only ever dated ONE guy in my whole life???
Being attractive is only a bonus, but I value more how a guy treats me. His race shouldn't be such a huge factor. I've been on dates with multiple men when I started college, all races and different types. My friends know this, yet they still bug me about only liking black men.
Does anyone else go through this? How do I communicate that I find it inappropriate and that it upsets me?
submitted by /u/crystalnometh
[link] [comments]
