I’ll make this as brief as possible, because I could write a book honestly.
I’ve [M25] known this girl [F26] (we’ll call her Sophie) since we were 8 years old. When we were about 12, we had a “relationship” which ended because she moved to a different country. In a strange way, this messed with my head. I always thought really highly of her, and wish she hadn’t moved. I told her this on one occasion, and she said she couldn’t really handle that, and didn’t know what to say, as there was obviously no way for us to be together at the time. (She was absolutely right about this, I just missed her is all.)
Flash forward 8 years, I move to the same country that she lives in. She’s in a relationship, and 8 years have passed. Nothing seems on the cards. We meet at a party, more or less by coincidence, and end up talking all night. She opens up to me a lot and tells me that she’s basically getting out of her relationship. I walk her home, and eventually we end up sharing a kiss – I know, not a nice move, but it happened.
We then don’t see eachother for a while, and I meet another girl (we’ll call her Julie) (we’re about a month down the timeline from the party) – and I start seeing her, and she’s great. We start going out. So obviously, what happens after a few weeks of dating Julie, is that Sophie contacts me and says she’s not in a relationship and asks if I want to see her. I tell her no, sorry, I have Julie now and care about her deeply.
On several occasions throughout my 3 year relationship with Julie, Sophie lets me know that she’s still interested in me. Not overly pushy or anything, it’s just obvious enough.
My relationship with Julie ends (for totally unrelated reasons), and Sophie finds out. I tell her I need time and I’m not ready to start dating. She says okay. This was about a year ago.
Now, I agreed to see Sophie last week, and honestly had the best time ever. I felt we connected on a level that really isn’t normal for me to click with people on. It was like being 12 all over again, just infinitely better as well. We kissed and stuff, and I honestly couldn’t get the smile off my face. She said she found an extreme comfort in my arms, that she really loved.
Now, this all sounds great. But at the same time, I can’t help but shake the idea that maybe she loved the chase? She’s always been a lousy replier to texts, which honestly isn’t all that bad – I don’t like to have relationships through the phone too much either – but as we can’t see eachother for the next few weeks, it’s sort of the only contact we have. And she takes 10-20 hours answering my messages.
What if she just liked the chase, and now that she felt I was into her, she’s like meh?
Any advice? I know this post isn’t very clear, so if you have any questions, please feel free to ask.
