I've been seeing someone for a few months (early Feb), but a couple of those months were in the pandemic. We decided to hit pause to not being to see each other but still kept in touch. I've been wanting to unpause now that the restrictions are easing.
I had the conversation to but it did not go well. He would not even consider us dating, which upset me. I had let him know early on im looking for a relationship. I asked him what we were even doing if he doesn't consider us dating because we're not friends, nor are we having just sex.
He expressed his hesitancy about being in a relationship and wanting more time to get to know each other.
All this was mainly miscommunications, he finally explained that dating = exclusivity = relationship to him, while to me they are three different stages.
Him being hesitant about being in a relationship meant, that he isn't sure about relationships all together, not just wanting more time with me.
I believe we managed to clear it up, and I made it clear that I want to unpause and work towards a relationship proactively. I am not asking for one now.
He eventually agreed to hangout more to figure it out but also stated that he feels more pressure now and needs to think.
I feel like I blew it, I got upset because of miscommunication and turned up the pressure on him which will eventually cause him to bail – it'll be my fault. At the same time I feel angry at him that I am not being unreasonable and his definitions are the ones that are skewed.
But most of all I feel vulnerable that I have put myself in a position where someone will make a decision on me.
Did I really blow it?
Edit: I feel like this could be a part of a crappy soap opera.
submitted by /u/ihugsyi
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